When you welcome a new baby, one of the first questions people will ask is: When can we come visit?
There is no one “right” answer, traditions and customs vary from family to family. Some parents receive visitors in the hospital, some wait until they are settled at home, and others host a baby reception) weeks or months later.
The most important thing? Choose what works for you, your baby, and your recovery, without feeling guilty.
1. Visit at the Hospital
In Belgium, it is still common for close family and friends to visit the new parents and baby in the maternity ward.
Fun fact: Traditionally, hospital visits here could be a bit… excessive. Guests would bring bottles of champagne or beer to the hospital room, fill the space with large bouquets and stacks of gifts, and stay chatting late into the evening, often with more and more people arriving one after the other. While the intentions were good, the reality is far from restful for the new parents.
How it should be…
Thankfully, in recent years, there has been a shift toward shorter, calmer visits that truly respect the needs of both baby and parents.
Pros:
- Visitors usually stay shorter, as the setting is less “homey.”
- No need to prepare your house or offer food/drinks.
- People are often more respectful of your recovery time.
Cons:
- You are still physically recovering, possibly tired or in pain.
- It can feel overwhelming if too many people come in a short period.
- Limited privacy for breastfeeding, skin-to-skin, or rest.
- Feeling pressure to look all nice and fresh for pictures. Not helpful as a new mom.
2. Visits at Home
Some parents prefer to wait until they are settled at home before inviting people over.
Pros:
- You are in your own environment and can decide who visits and when.
- Visitors can spend more relaxed time with you and the baby.
- You can tailor your visits to your baby’s and family’s schedule.
- Your visitors may be able to help you out, even if it is just so you can drink your coffee.
Cons:
- You may feel pressure to tidy up or offer food/drinks.
- If visits are spread out, you might feel like you have “endless” visitors over weeks.
- It is harder to control the length of the visit.
3. Baby party
The baby party aka babyborrel is a unique Belgian tradition that goes back for decades. It is a practical way for parents to introduce their newborn to a wider circle of family, friends, colleagues, and neighbors all at once, usually held 1–3 months after birth, sometimes later.
The idea is simple: instead of hosting many small visits, you organize one festive moment where everyone can meet the baby. It is often held in a rented venue or at home with drinks, snacks, and sometimes even live music.
Pros:
- Everyone meets the baby on the same day, leaving you more privacy the rest of the time.
- Can be a joyful, memorable event with lots of photos and videos.
- Gives you time to recover before introducing the baby to a larger group.
Cons:
- Can be tiring, stressing and expensive to organize.
- Some people still want to visit earlier. They may have a gift and can not wait to give it 🙂
- The baby may be overstimulated by noise, lights, and crowds.
Finding what’s right for you, as a family and let go of your guilt
No matter what you choose, someone will have an opinion. Here is how to protect your peace of mind:
- Remember: it is your baby, your body, your family, your rules.
- You do not owe anyone an explanation. A simple “We will let you know when we are ready for visits” is enough. No need to explain your agenda or your new born routines to anybody.
- Surround yourself with people who respect your choices.
- Focus on what makes you feel comfortable, a calm parent is the best gift to your baby.
💛 There is no “right” way to handle baby visits, just the way that is right for you. Whether you choose the hospital, your home, or a festive baby party, the goal is the same: to introduce your little one in a way that feels joyful, not stressful.
Lots of love,
Sarah
